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Writer's pictureMorgan Fagg

Telenovela (Soap Opera)

As seen on TV

They say, there be dragons over there,

but I’m not frightened, I’m not scared

I’ve checked the register, I’ll take a boat

if that’s what it takes with no postal vote


Mary Robinson lit the light

that gives us hope

We’ll flock to the flame, We’ll bloody vote

I don’t believe in three-headed Dragons

I’ve never watched Wonderly Wagon

but The Den was my favourite show

political puppets and their jokes


We have seen All Kinds of Everything

Like a Eurovision TV star

Who couldn’t even start her car

Will Dustin or Danna ever run again?

But don’t sell me products

I don’t need detergents

This is not a Soap Opera

This is not the West End

Shark Tank Vs Government Jets

A Westside Story wrestling match

So take your bar of soap

and salesmen

The first rule of Fight Club,

don't tell your friends


Our president has entertained us WELL

What's the name of our American friend?


Michael Graham he is called

I’ve heard him on Newstalk

scalded by his cup of Tea

whipping up fear, for you and me


But Michael D, would not let it be

Like Richard Harris in The Field

Go back yank, with your bloody tanks

Some of us have been working for peace

Desmond Tutu, Robinson and me

Michael D, he spilled the beans

and scaled him with his Tea


So bring the popcorn and watch the show

I’ve seen Sein Féin slay dragons

on The Late Late Show

Under Siege with Star Trek’s

Colm Meaney. The Journey “up the pole” for Martin McGuinness


No more rehearsing, the limelight calls,

Is this episode/show ready for Prime Time?

should we change to Crime Line?

Or is this just another repeat,

I’ve seen it all before


This is not the Oscars

arriving in black cars

we remember Moonlight

and a dragon scarred

No more envelopes, no more excuses

The money was just resting in my account

Ive heard THAT from a parochial house

all from the comfort of my couch


I’ll bring the popcorn and watch

The Late Late Show

but the poet gave us Irish Television,

not just an episode

He brought Matt Damon and

Stephen Spielberg to our shores

Let’s not forget to mention T. Hanks


I’ll skip the ads and go straight to talking healthcare on Breaking Bad

This is not Trump’s Apprenticeship

But like Mel Gibson and Brendan Gleeson

He showed us a Braveheart


“For presenting yourself on this battlefield, I gave you thanks”

Michael D is not seven feet tall, he is not a dragon on tv

he cannot fire fireballs from his eyes

or defeat BREXIT with lighting from his Áras

but dying in your beds, many years from now

For all the days from now until then


I’ll vote for the poet once again




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