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Writer's pictureMorgan Fagg

The Greatest Man Alive

Updated: Oct 18, 2019

I call him the greatest man alive because he always makes me smile.

Divorced from Trump’s reality, his world resembles mine as the Apprentice attacks all semblance of normality.


He survived windmill cancer but will his marriage survive this microwave “tapped” reality?


He dodged a bullet with the Bowling Green Massacre, let’s not forget that alternative fact

He is not a space cadet but never dodged the Space draft when the Space Force needed him.


He never lawyered up when questioned about

the president’s mental illness or psychopathic tendencies. He is simply the greatest man alive, following in John McCain’s footsteps.


I wonder if he took a knee when proposing to his queen. That act must have hurt the president’s feelings, knowing what Kellyanne's husband thinks of him.


He offers us “honesty and transparency” and questions the president’s sanity.

Fox & Friends won’t question “Summer Camps” so don’t bother calling Hannity,


His wife loves Ivanka’s products and violating the Hatch Act

If only the Feds could catch her in the act.

Then she might find she has to call the greatest man alive

as her husband is a lawyer and a cartoon character of himself


Men are from Mars and Women from Venus

but did you hear about the president’s mushroom shaped penis?


Kellyanne will need a good lawyer when it comes to violating the Hatch Act

I really shouldn’t have gone out and bought Ivanka’s “wardrobe”

her Chinese made merchandise, cheap at half the price

but George is a husband who worries about his wife.


His estranged life partner, answers the age old question

what would happen if Barbie opened the ark of the covenant

and Nazi’s occupied the White House?


I know those Concentration Camps don’t have soap

but please delouse the executive mansion, that is not a joke.


Read between her dated laughter lines, things are not alright

Donald Trump is known, for separating families

How will their’s survive the repeated Trump attacks


A cartoon character of himself, the courtroom scene plays out,

straight from the funny pages, lawyers make the best comedians

as Jon Steward saves 911 firemen, what has happened to our heroes?


Trump’s lawyers defend toiletries in Concentration Camps

Whatever happened to “Summer Camps”

soap and shampoo and diapers, sometimes politicians need changing too


“The Moon is part of Mars” George Conway is a star

Luke don’t walk on Leia's grave, she will always be a superstar

on Earth as on Alderan, as Trump wages war on our planet.


Divorced from all reality, Dr Jeckle marries Miss Hyde.

The lawyer and his bride, who is always ready to lie,

invent alternative truths and hide behind a smile

but her husband is simply the greatest man alive.


Was he the class clown in Harvard?

Haven’t we all been called to the bar?

I’ll have what he is having,

Order Kellyanne a Bowling Green martini.


Jon Steward represents emergency services

as George Conway makes fun of the president

Lawyers and comedians always have the last laugh

it’s all about practice and timing.


Practice and timing but will Barrack Obama do Jury Duty

when Kellyanne et al get arrested and investigated.


Presidential pardons unlikely from a man who never says sorry.



Translating some of this nonsense

George Conway is married to Kellyanne Conway who is one of Trump’s closest advisors.

She has made a few gaffs in her day such as calling things “Alternative Facts” misrepresenting an event in Bowling Green which she called a massacre when it wasn’t.


Trump has accused windmills of causing cancer and George Conway in heroic fashion has joked that he is a Windmill Cancer Surviver.


Trump has also claimed that the Moon is part of Mars which again, Conway has included in his Twitter account and uses a courtroom sketch artist’s picture of himself.



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